Love Dare Day 13
I took a bit of a break over the weekend. I worked a ton of hours (not even seeing daylight for three days) and Aaron was off on a much needed Godly men's retreat! So here we are Monday afternoon and back to the grind. Well, not really, I've been given permission to be lazy today. Not that I need permission, but it does help me to take the pressure off myself to 'do it all.' We have soccer tonight and I also plan to attend our ladies Bible study at church, so my laziness will end soon. For now, I'd like to focus on the Love Dare at hand.
2. We will not bring up old, unrelated items from the past.
3. We will never fight in public or in front of our children.
4. We will call a “time out” if conflict escalates to a damaging level.
5. We will never touch one another in a harmful way.
6. We will never go to bed angry with one another.
7. Failure is not an option. Whatever it takes, we will work this out.
“Me” boundaries:
1. I will listen first before speaking. “Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger” (James 1:19).
2. I will deal with my own issues up-front. “Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?” (Matthew 7:3)
3. I will speak gently and keep my voice down. “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1).
I think the book's boundaries are stated clearly and precisely. We will not add or take from these boundaries. I will be chatting with Aaron about the boundaries laid before us, but we already follow (at least try) the above mentioned boundaries.
Love Fights Fair
If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. – Mark 3:25
"Married couples who learn to work through conflict tend to be closer, more trusting, more intimate, and enjoy a much deeper connection afterwards." A quote from "Love Dare."
The above statement is so true! When Aaron and I were faced with infidelity nearly two years ago, our marriage was in shambles. We chose to work through all the conflict associated with that together and our marriage is the best it's ever been! We are closer, more trusting, more intimate, and so much deeper than ever before!
Today’s Dare
Talk with your spouse about establishing healthy rules of engagement. If your mate is not ready for this, then write out your own personal rules to “fight” by. Resolve to abide by them when the next disagreement occurs.
"Love Dare" talks about boundaries or rules to live by when working through conflict. The book states there are two types of boundaries: "we" boundaries and "me" boundaries.
"We" boundaries:
1. We will never mention divorce.2. We will not bring up old, unrelated items from the past.
3. We will never fight in public or in front of our children.
4. We will call a “time out” if conflict escalates to a damaging level.
5. We will never touch one another in a harmful way.
6. We will never go to bed angry with one another.
7. Failure is not an option. Whatever it takes, we will work this out.
“Me” boundaries:
1. I will listen first before speaking. “Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger” (James 1:19).
2. I will deal with my own issues up-front. “Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?” (Matthew 7:3)
3. I will speak gently and keep my voice down. “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1).
I think the book's boundaries are stated clearly and precisely. We will not add or take from these boundaries. I will be chatting with Aaron about the boundaries laid before us, but we already follow (at least try) the above mentioned boundaries.
Be of the same mind toward one another. (Romans 12:16)
All material taken from "The Love Dare" by Alex and Stephen Kendrick or Klove.com/blog
All material taken from "The Love Dare" by Alex and Stephen Kendrick or Klove.com/blog
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